ugh... it's really hit me...

As I sit here writing, I'm sniffling and wiping away tears and snot.. Today for the second time in a week or two my clothes were accidentally dried. You may not think this is a big deal. However, the first time my husband dried one of my favorite shirts and I cried a little.. over it already.. Today my mom dried and shrunk a load of clothes that already BARELY fits me and quite possibly the only clothes that fit me.. I feel so unbelievably defeated.. At first she said "oh you'll fit into them again" until I told her that's about all I do fit into, then I could tell she felt horrible.. not the reaction I was going for.. I just wanted to tell her not to touch my clothes every again.. lol... (and, before I get any lectures, I do know how lucky I am that my mom came over to visit and did a load of laundry for me).. I've started digging into my husbands closet for t-shirts because mine just don't fit right and my favorite pair of shorts didn't do up this morning.. Today has been a total reality check and as I sit here tearing up again all I want to do is dig back into shitty food again.. Why is it when we are at our lowest point we still want the thing that brings us down the most??

Phew...

Today I ate onion rings... I've felt dirty ever since.. Blech.. I have been doing *okay* lately.. I'd much prefer to believe that I can do this without exercise...buuuuuttttttt... Yeah, not happening! Lol!!

Awww... It's been a long few days and I'm hoping that tomorrow I wake up refreshed and ready to take on some healthy activity!!

Oh boy...

Well, since my last post in February I have gained more weight... It's now 0 down and 60 to go... :( I'm not proud of this, and am in fact pissed off that I let myself get to this point.. First of all, I just gave up when I got poison ivy working in my yard and could barely move my legs without having horrible itching and scratching... It was beyond debilitating as far as exercise goes...

However, now I have a good outlook (most of the time) and I'm tracking my food intake with spark people and have lost 1.5lbs! :)

I'll be on here more because I know I need to vent, etc in order to be successful!!

Wish me luck!! :)

lack of motivation..

I have been under the weather and lost a good portion of my motivation.. any suggestions? I downloaded an app onto my iphone to help mix up my workouts a little so I'm not getting stagnant.. Hopefully that helps..

What do you do to keep your motivation?

Well, well, well...

I recently went to the doctor and found out I'm having some issues that may be causing me to have a little bit of a harder time losing this weight... I won't bore you with details but I was given solutions (all natural) so hopefully I'll speed this along a little better!!

I'm feeling good about the inches I've lost but Ian getting a little annoyed with the weight loss not happening.. I've decided to start eating a lot more fruits and veggies and cutting way back on my bread intake.. I'm an admitted starch-aholic and I've got to (mostly) kick that habit or I'll stay this weight... Anyone whose had luck in this dept I'll need all the insight you can give me!! Anyone??

Wow..

How come every Thursday I feel like I want to gorge... Fridays weigh-in is brutal if I indulge myself.. Today I swam for over an hour with my youngest andi felt great afterwards... I have a feeling we'll all sleep good tonight!! Lol!

I'm also thinking of getting a nutritionist in to give us some suggestions.. Anyone ever do this? Anyone you suggest??

another good workout!!

I keep going up in my calories for the arc trainer and I'm just working really hard and loving it!! Okay, that's a slight lie.. Around 5-10 minutes in I do think about giving up and then I remember that it gets better!!

I have been feeling really good, I've had a few slip ups with the halloween candy in the house.. But I think I've done relatively good! That and I've now put the candy in my pantry so I can't see it! lol.. Mind over matter..

Wish me luck that I stay on this track!!